Next thing I know I am sat a party of 10 which I make 15 dollars off of, then got slammed with tables, and at end of night ended up exceeding my goal coming in. Was it in my timing or the way I would have wanted? No. Did it involve fear? Yes. But did I push through the fear and trust God over feelings and circumstances? Yes. And what happened. He came through as always.
Why, after time and time again God comes through do I doubt His mercy and love. Not just in shifts. But in life, in school, in recovery. I doubt the Truth of His word, His goodness, His mercy for someone as undeserving as me. And yet He continues to come through.
So at end of night I said screw it. Screw fear. Screw ED. Screw living life in misery. I want to trust
I don’t know what tomorrow may bring. I don’t know if my faith will be as strong. But for right now, for today, for this moment, I praise God. I praise His mercy, His love, His faith, and the strength He so freely gives. Thank you Lord, and help me stand in your truth for the moments, days, and years to come. I want to serve You, trust You, and make You proud.